The Curse of Malibu Creek

My last post was about my addiction to all things running and how I pushed myself to the brink at the Malibu Creek 22k. Well, it seems like Malibu Creek is dominating my life or better yet, it is the race that has cursed me. Why? Well for one, I am back here writing about the same trail again. Tomorrow there will be hundreds lining up to run the Bulldog 50k and 25k at Malibu Creek and instead of being amongst the hundred struggling up the mean climb known as Bulldog, I will be sitting here mad that I can run because of a damn cold that I haven’t been able to shake for a week and most likely due to pushing myself way too hard in order to do well at tomorrow’s race. Guess my plan backfired or maybe the Malibu Creek curse has emerged. I have yet to run a great race at this park and I figured this would be the weekend that it would happen. Only just a few hours ago did I really decide I am backing out of the race even though most of the week I have been completely and utterly kicked in the ass with a fever, stuffed of head, and a chest that feels like a smoke factory. Last night I began to prepare all my gear and then I laid a plan to run the race in stages where I could rest and hike the 15 miles that has normally broke my back but when I got up today and I my calve felt like it cramped up for no reason, I knew it was time to waive the white flag. I thought about what my Grandmother would say if she were alive and it would be “you need to rest” and she would then make me promise her I would and there was nobody I respected more than my Grandmother. So tomorrow I rest but me and Malibu have some unfinished business.

I Need Help for My Addiction

I sit two days removed from the Malibu Creek 22K and I am little worse for wear. My feet are swollen, my calves hurt so bad that I can barely walk without limping. I reflect a bit and realize just how hard I pushed myself at the race. I realize just how lucky I am because in all seriousness I could have had a heat stroke possibly kidney failure from pushing as hard as I did. My hands were swollen after the race and when I got home, I weighed myself and realized I lost 6 pounds. These are all signs of pushing way too hard and now my body is pushing back. Is there ever a time when you have to say enough during a race? There is but I always believed that when I reach that point, I would say F%#* you and just keep on going but on Saturday there were moments in that race that I felt something else and it was a bit of doubt and fear that I may have pushed too much but I still pushed on? That is what separates some of us who are determined to do whatever it takes to run a race and get to the finish line where most don’t see the point and I wouldn’t expect them to from their living room sofa. Running is an addiction like any other addiction. Think about it.

Runner’s run in the rain, 90-100 degree weather, they run in the snow, they run inside on treadmills, they run outside on hills. Runner’s run when they are sick, runner’s run when they are hungover. Runner’s run to run and runner’s run for fun. The worst thing for a runner is to have an injury because they will try to run through it only to make things worse. Why, why, why? Because it is an addiction like those who need that last cigarette, or that last sip of whiskey. You need to have it, you need to do it, no matter the condition, the consequence and when you can’t, you are miserable and unhappy. I have come to grips with the fact that my addiction will someday kill me but at least I will die doing something I love doing and that is competing and enjoying my life.

Running is free but the pain could last a lifetime!

You think you know what hills feel like?

In 2005, I ran my first trail race which was the Malibu Creek 6k. Very few people ran trails back then and my only experience on the trails was a little bit of hiking that felt like a monumental task. When I did the 6k, it seemed like I had just accomplished a something great but about 20 minutes after, the fast runners who had run the 22k race started to cross the finish line. When I saw a guy cross the finish line with only one arm, I realized though the 6k was a tough race, I had done nothing and felt pretty small at that moment yet I still had no real desire to run the 22k. People always say things like “you’ve run a marathon so you should be fine” which shows just how little people know about trails and the extreme difficulty of the race. I decided in 2011 that I could longer just run the 6k at Malibu and that it was time to try the 22k. I guess it was the fear of the unknown that kept from running it but I figured how hard could it really be? I mean after all, I could run 26 miles and 14 miles seems like nothing but I found out in 2011 that this race, this trail, and all its challenges were more than I could have imagined in terms of difficulty and yesterday I lined up again to run this race that had just about took everything I had to just make it 6 miles.

What is the big deal about the Malibu race? One word; Bulldog! Bulldog is the climb at mile 3 of the race that seems like you are running with a piano strapped to your back that is if you can run it. If you manage to make it to the top around mile 5.6 or so then you get some downhill relief to mile 7 until you have to run back up for another mile. This up and down sequence continues until mile 9 where you feel like you can run up no more and thank God because you start an insane downhill run until hitting mile 12 where you exit out of Malibu Creek State park to run along the highway for a minute then enter back into the park. You would think, “cool, if I can just hang on, I will be at the finish in no time”. Sorry, because mile 13 is back up and nasty incline where you need every ounce of strength and energy to just move your legs and feet. When you reach the top, you go back down a series of switchbacks until you reach the roach where you have a nice 4 minute run to the finish.

2011, I sucked, 2012 I was no better, and yesterday may have been my worst performance at the race. I think I was toast about 10 minutes into the climb up Bulldog. You things are bad when you can’t pass people twice your age or better yet, they are passing you. I chatted with this guy Spencer who said it was his first time running the race but he had hike Kilamanjaro but none of that matter yesterday because he was crawling his way up bulldog like everyone else. If the incline wasn’t enough, the sun came out and it felt like it was a 102 degrees. I knew I was in trouble because I was drenched. I lost way too many fluids and I had another two miles until the top. I felt my spirit say this is it. I am not going to make it up this trail today. My legs ached, my back ached, and I just wanted to stop. I kept pushing and pushing and when we hit the top and I began to run downhill, I felt my calve twinge and if you have ever felt that twinge in your muscles then you know that it is only a matter of time before the real cramps start. From mile 6 until the finish line, I cramped up but I just tried to run through it. When we started the crazy run downhill from mile 9 I thought I would be able to make up ground but the cramps kept coming. I ignored them and ran hard but when it was time to run back up before exiting the park, my legs locked and I looked like Frankenstein running from a mob. When I eventually crossed the finish line, I could care less about time, medals, or anything. I just wanted a beer and off to the beer garden I went where there were an assortment of runners chilling and relaxing and equally sharing their war stories from the race.

I left this race once again just humbled and understanding that I have a ton of work to do. I came to the race hoping to knock off 30 minutes form my previous time but I ended up adding to my time. Trails are work and to be successful on the trails you have to put in the time and you have to want to run the hills. It is the only way to get better. I have a long way to go but I am up to the challenge.

Back to the drawing board.

10 Times LA Equals a Decade of Running

It is all over. I completed my tenth consecutive LA Marathon and I think I am ready to run number 11. I knew I was ill prepared for this marathon because I had only trained for it from the beginning of February to just three weeks ago. That is barely enough time to train for a half marathon but there was no reason to panic. I have run the race 9 times so why did I seem so nervous and apprehensive the week leading up to the race? It may have been because I spent more time trying to figure out what costume or disguise to run the race in, when I should have been focusing on a running strategy. I also made one of the biggest mistakes before the race in going up to Mt. Wilson just three weeks beforehand and I ran as hard as hard as I could downhill killing my quads to a point where they hurt worse than when I have completed a marathon. I did my best to combat the pain but my legs remained sore for days. I had no options except to rest and ice and hope for the best on the day of the race and that is what I did.
The day of the Marathon I felt like it was just another day. I got up, headed to Santa Monica to board the shuttle to Dodger Stadium and just sat back for the ride. When we got to Dodger Stadium, I found a spot at the opposite entrance so I could just sit and relax and not be bothered. There are several types of people who run this race. There are those who are out there for the social aspect whereas I like to just zone out to myself. This is the first time the time just seem to speed on by and before I knew it, the race was starting. I was experiencing a stomach pain like no other and I couldn’t tell if it was nerves or consuming way too many fluids but one thing I knew was that it wasn’t going away. I took my time and got ready because I knew I had time with that many runners and we had timing chips so it really didn’t matter when I got to the start line. I think I was also trying to keep my running outfit a secret all the way up to the start and that is a good thing because as soon as I took off the jacket, a photographer came up to me asking me to pose for a photo. I learned a lesson and that is Superman is more popular than Batman, at least on that day. I have never garnished so much fan support from the start of the race until the finish.
Something was different about this race. I have run this course at least 4 times and for some reason it just seemed like I couldn’t remember anything about the course. I was just out there. I was running in my own world and at my own pace but my stomach continued to plague me. I felt sick to my stomach and really could not drink enough fluids so I knew that could come back to bite me but I just pushed on. I normally just take off and start running at a faster pace so I could make up time but on this day, I just figured I would enjoy myself and soak up the atmosphere. This was number 10! A decade of running and I wanted to enjoy every minute of it. The highlight of the day was seeing my friend Caryn out on the course cheering me on as she said she would. I ran as hard as I could to honor her and her battle with cancer and the struggles that comes along with it. Her drive and will kept me driving my legs all the way to finish in superman fashion.
I sit 5 days removed from the race and I cannot believe how good I feel. I have never felt this good physically and mentally and I feel like I could lace up the shoes and go out for a run right now but for once I am going to take it easy and enjoy in the accomplishment of completing a decade of running and continuing my marathon streak to 10 in a row!!!
LA IS BEST EVEN WITH THE STRESS

Mt. Ouch!

Being behind on training sucks and I only have less than 14 days left before the marathon and I really have not had a chance to do some long and gritty training. With less than two weeks left, I knew this weekend would be my one chance to do a long run but I figured I needed to do more than just do a long run. I needed to do something that would test me physically and mentally and there is only one place to do that and that is up on the trails and there is no test better than Mt. Wilson. I have blogged before about Mt. Wilson and I will keep blogging about it until I stop blogging. It is like my white whale. The one thing I cannot conquer but I keep on trying anyway. I have been to Mt. Wilson a total of 5 times over the last 4 years and I have only made it to the top once and that was my first time there. By the top, I mean a grueling hike literally up for 7 miles. The only downhill comes in the early miles but it is then followed by steeper and nastier incline to which your back throbs, your calves ache and you just feel like nature is playing a cruel joke on you.

I knew that if I really wanted to see where I was physically then it was time to hit the trail. I started off today with problem after problem. I spilled most of my Gatorade and luckily I had two bottles of water I stuffed in my hydration pack but I had no nutrition to help fuel me on the trail and that would be a key today. Ten minutes in my back started aching. I just tried to keep my momentum going passing up people along the way. Funny thing about Mt. Wilson is you’ll notice everyone walking like zombie turtles. They are hunched over, slowly moving, and gasping for air so there is no surprise when you start doing the same. I pushed, and pushed, and the sweat just began to pour down my face so I took my hat off to get some air and since the sun was still hiding, I was ok. I started running at one point, hoping to get some energy and I wanted to try and pick up my pace. Once I came to the tiny water creek, I knew it was time to climb again and climb I did. At times I found myself stopping and questioning whether I should turn back. I started to regret not bringing any snacks. I could feel my stomach growl and all I had was Gatorade that I needed to conserve and two bottles of water that I sipped slowly but regardless, I pushed on. My legs felt good at one point but then the trail would turn and go up and up. This is the kind of incline that makes you feel like you are on a treadmill because you’re literally going nowhere. My goal was to make it to the 5.2 mile mark no matter what and after 2 hours, I finally did with really nothing in the tank. I said hello to a few people sitting there and back down I went.

Downhill is my thing but a 5 mile climb up steep trails means you are running downhill for 5 miles at a blazing fast pace where you are trying not to break your neck. Most of the time, you are killing your quads to a point where you wish you were running uphill and that is saying a lot. My quads were beyond on fire but I finally made it back. It took me a total of 3 hours and 18 minutes and that is for 10.4 miles. 3 hours and 18 minutes in a marathon would be at least 18 miles but this is why I believe Mt. Wilson is every bit as difficult and more challenging than running the marathon. Once I reached a certain ridge at Mt. Wilson, it is supposed to be 1.9 miles to the 5.2 mile point. It took me over and hour and a half to go 1.9 miles. That is just absurd. You talk about mental challenge. There is just you and the trail. No water stations, no first aid, and no cheering section. I love the marathon because when you are just flat out tired, you can walk. At Mt. Wilson, you are walking when you are tired but you are walking up 2500 feet of elevation gain. There is just no relief from that but there is no other place I would rather be. The trail allows you to find your mental toughness. You have to dig deep, and you have to want to keep going similar to the late miles of the marathon. I could have done a long run but I doubt I would have had the type of test I did today that lets me know that I am ready to run 26.2 in two weeks.

My quads are a little angry..

A Decade of Inspiration

When I ran the LA marathon for the first time, who knew I would still be running a decade later? Who knew that my dad would succumb to cancer and pass away peacefully in his sleep the next morning after I completed my first marathon? Who knew? I couldn't have imagined either of those things, and I couldn't have imagined that this year, I will be running the LA Marathon for the 10th time in a row. Running that marathon 10 years ago was something I did to honor my dad. I had not imagined that after that horrible day that I would ever run another marathon again but here I am. My dad inspired me to do something different. I could have come up with several ways to show him that I was along in the fight against cancer but I chose a marathon for a reason. A marathon seemed like the most out of sorts thing I could do. After all, I hated running. I chose something that most people hate and let alone 26 miles of it. The result was a painful experience. It was a battle with something I had no experience with and I was not prepared at all but my dad was not prepared for battling cancer so I had no excuse.
I suffered that day of the marathon but I knew that it was nothing compared to what my dad went through day in and day out. I fought mile, after mile and it took everything in me not to quit but I completed the battle of the 26 mile race only to learn the next morning that my dad’s battle was over. I was unsure how to feel and what to do and running supplied me an escape from all my problems and the stresses of the world and it became my safe haven. I knew that the LA Marathon and I would always be connected and I wanted to continue that connection by vowing to run the LA marathon every year until I just cannot do it anymore.

Each year, I draw inspiration from my dad to continue to train hard no matter the injuries, no matter the setbacks, and no matter the situation. Each year someone seems to ask me if I am running the marathon and I respond the same way each year, which is “what do you think”? If I have to crawl to finish the race, then that is what I will do.
This year, as I continue to train and prepare for the race, I felt that it would only be fitting to honor two people who have inspired me and that is my friend Larry Henderson and my friend Caryn Roach. This past year, Larry had a brain tumor removed and then he had to deal with the horrors of chemotherapy and treatments all year long. Larry kept his faith and he remained positive and through God’s will, he came out with a clean bill of health. Not once, did I ever hear him complain. Instead he remained optimistic, and faithful and strong, showing that there is nothing you cannot overcome when you believe. He proved that no tumor or illness could keep him down. He showed what a person of true will and an unbreakable spirit can accomplish. Larry amazed me and inspired me to realize that there was no one thing I could complain about and that I had every reason to get off my ass and make every minute count.

Then there is Caryn. Not sure what to say about Caryn except, if you know Caryn then I shouldn't have to say much. I am not sure I have ever seen her with anything except a smile on her face so it only seemed natural that after a diagnosis of Hodgkins Lymphoma she would be a little grumpy but instead of being grumpy she helped raise money for Team in Training and then went out and ran 3:49 in the Tinkerbell Half-Marathon. Not impressed, well you should be because it was four months after her diagnosis and after 8 treatments of chemotherapy. Are you kidding me???. With a nasty blister that barely left any skin on her foot Caryn relentlessly pushed on and on until crossing the finishing line. If you need to be convinced of her heart and will after that, then you need your ass kicked and Caryn is just the person to do it. I cannot say enough about Caryn and her resilience and my heart is with her as she continues her fight to beat cancer and her road back to recovery. I am use to seeing Caryn somewhere out on the marathon course, battling those last few miles and I know she is unable to run this year but I hope to see her on the sidelines cheering on.

If you need inspiration, then you should look no further. Larry and Caryn are two of my heroes. I cannot walk in their shoes, but I can be here as a friend to let them know how much I care about their struggles and their battles through the treatments, through the ups, the downs, and the days when it just downright sucks. This year, I am running to pay honor to both of them as they've inspired me and they are two real life heroes. As I step to the line for the 10th year in a row of the LA Marathon, it will be memorable for so many reasons. Caryn and Larry, thanks for the inspiration and know that you always have my support and friendship.


Race only matters if you are running one!