It has been a while since I put my fingers on the keyboard and typed up a new running blog but time flies when you are having no fun and running has to be put on hold but I am back. It seems like an eternity since my last running event, the UCLA 5K to be exact, which was in May. The UCLA 5k has the worst course and I have never run the race well and to add to the running dread my ex bosses thirteen year old son has run the race the last 3 years continuously making me worry that he would one of these year’s eclipse me and make me realize my running days are over but each year he has shot out from the start super fast and he would burn out before even hitting mile one. All that youth and energy was no match for my experience and runner savvy but this year was different.
He kicked my ass for the first mile which was ok but when he kept going and didn’t burn out like he usually does, I thought, “this is finally the year this little bastard is going to get me” but just when I thought I would I have to adhere to the ridicule from his parents and everyone else for being beaten by a 13-year old, he stopped and starting walking. He was still about 50 yards ahead but I knew I had him and when he turned to see where I was, I knew that his spirit was all but whipped. True runner and competitor that I am, I ran up next to him and encouraged him to keep running and he did. I expended a lot of energy just to catch him and my legs ached and my chest burned but there was no way in hell I was stopping. I poured it on and when I glanced over my shoulder, I noticed he stopped. I pulled out a victory over a 13 year old and still I wasn’t satisfied because my overall performance sucked so I decided to make up my dreaded performance by running home at a blistering pace. I had pushed myself to the limit when I really didn’t need to. I knew I needed a break and so did my body.
A week before the UCLA 5K, I ran the 14 mile Malibu Creek trail run for the first time. Previously I had run the 4-mile race four years in a row and I was always bent over gasping for air afterwards so running 14 miles at that trail seemed like a death certificate waiting to happen but I knew I had to at least attempt it. I felt like a real stud after running the 4 mile race for the first time but as I stood there gloating and sharing my difficulty with other runners, a guy came streaming through the finish line. He had just completed the 14 mile race a little after I had finished the 4 mile race. Then I looked a little closer and noticed he only had one arm. Here I was thinking I had something to brag about but this guy made me realize that the 4 mile was great when you are a beginner but if you truly wanted to be tested, you had to run the 14 mile race, otherwise you were just another bystander standing there feeling a little short changed. I went back and forth before signing up this year but eventually I made up my mind to suck it up and do the race.
I finished the Malibu 14 mile trail race but it was psychologically the most demanding race I’ve ever done. I had a modest goal to finish the race under 3 hours and finished right at 3 hours and 2 minutes but I mentally and physically destroyed myself. This race made me reach into a bag of tricks that was just empty and that is when I knew I was just teetering on the edge of being burnt out. Everyone hits a wall of some sort in a marathon but no one talks about hitting a wall in general with their running but it happens.
I have cranked out 14 to 15 running events a year for the last seven years. At some point, it gets to you; training, working a full time job, studying, the injuries, the highs, the lows. It’s a miracle I have been able to keep up the pace that I have been on for this long. My body however and my mind needed a much overdue break so I have spent the last month being a bum and it has felt great. On Monday, I laced up my bright orange asics running shoes for the first time in a month and off I went to the beach to run.
I went back to where it all started for me, down on the bike path in Santa Monica close to San Vicente. When I trained for the first marathon I ever did, I ran what I thought was about a stretch of 4 or 5 miles but found during the marathon that I may have only been running two or 3 miles and boy did I suffer during the race but I got use to running down on the bike path and I loved it. It was my spot, it was my escape and more importantly it was where I discovered for myself what running was all about. As time moved on things became more complex. I had to have the perfect spot and I had to get to where the best hills were or I had to have the best hat or shoes but I forgot about the simplicity of the sport which is just get out there and run and forget about all the rest of the nonsense. No race bibs or expos, or running groups. All I needed was my running shoes, the ocean, and the breeze. What I realized was how much I missed just running. Not for time or an age division medal but just for the sport. I rediscovered that and I also rediscovered how great life can be when you slow down, take a deep breath and do what you love. I’m sure I will be back on the racing circuit soon but for now, I am enjoying my time running without a care in the world.
